So, she is interesting, different indeed, you’re starting to taste those sprinkles of love here and there, you don’t mind at all spending your useless time getting to know someone. Well, not someone, this one, who not long ago meant nothing to you, a stranger with those already undeniable eyes, an ashy so vivid, hysterically asking you to look back, at least for a little longer, long enough to make you fall in love. That’s all eyes can tell, if you’re ready to excuse a few moments of your sudden life to properly listen. They will speak to you, but watch out for they can just as easily take it all back, while timidly looking away.
A hot start launches you somewhere you shouldn’t have reached just yet. You are simply too into it. And this suddenly unconscious but avid interest of yours, it will work badly for you, more than sometimes.
She may take you as a guy who says too much, interacts excessively, a man who is, or seems, inevitably, too much. And your wide overestimation can shortly become a handful of nothing, without you seeing it coming. She won’t say it, but you’ll sense it, the ever-increasing restraint of hers.
I don’t know if she was the one who mistook you, but you’re basically too far ahead, so distanced you couldn’t even notice that she’s already taken a right and left you riding alone, on that miserable swiftly road paved with your incisive hope and excessive expectation.
We are the cause of our own disappointment, most of the times. We give too much and expect it returned in an identical measure, preferably more, doesn’t matter if it spills over the brim. You’ll lick it from wherever it may have slipped into. We’re wild and blind, and especially too amenably present for no apparent reason, and without a single solicitation.
We there remain, everywhere, every time, whether we feel like it or not, though it usually feels fantastic. Those talks, they suddenly play the role of your life, you crave and care for them, perhaps unreasonably, and this is when the situation derails.
Your ability to tend and attend, consistently, will betray you. You’ll start being a burden instead of the caring person you actually are. She will get it wrong, and you’ll try and wrong yourself to fix it rightly, but she’s too out already, she never truly entered your cloud, a cloud you ruled, alone, all that time.
Sometimes, it looks like it takes meaningless words and hypocritical smiles, it takes everything but love for love to start.
One of the saddest mistakes is to love someone whilst you aren’t allowed to do it, not yet. Your burning love, it will blow her away, scared. Hide it and make sure you kill your impatience. Perspire shallowness for as long as depth isn’t asked of you.
Don’t sear your heart offering your will all at once. Wait, each time she returns, give her another little of the same, or less. If a day rises when she struggles, angry, disgruntled but still willing to come back, as you’re handing her bare meager crumbles of what you really are; only then you should offer yourself, whole, for she came with intent of staying.