From the very first moment we fall in love with someone, we start picturing how it will be like to live with them. Our brain works that way, we wonder and attempt to predict and anticipate what may and may not happen. Five years from now where will I be? Married and father of two beautiful girls or alone and happy with whatever I’ve accomplished in life so far. That’s an uncertainty we struggle with as we always keep trying to find answers. We want to be in control, but with time, maturity and experience we learn that we cannot define what is still to come.
But let’s talk about the present, this exact moment. Where are you right now? Do you like being where you are or do you find yourself frustrated because this isn’t what you had in mind?
In terms of love, time is of the essence. Love is a game of waiting, understanding and mostly, understanding why you are waiting. Waiting for that one person you think is worth spending your time on. Will she have a major role in your future? You don’t know! But you expect so! Otherwise, would you be available to offer that kind of constant attention and empathy? Expecting nothing in return? Humans are selfish, we won’t deny it. What we do, is not purely altruistic, for we do it with the spite of having it returned in some way, ahead in time. And our way of wanting something to come back to us is not bad at all. It’s good as it motivates us to be desirable for someone and, therefore, be good for the world itself, our society. Love definitely brightens our world and leads the common man to make change and be the best he can possibly be.
So let’s give from us and hope gratitude will come home fallen for the sky.
But what if that good retribution never arrives? What if she will never be capable of nourishing you with love. She grants you will definitely not be present in her romantic future, you are only a friend, not a lover. She loves you like a brother, because she can’t respect you as a man. She can’t feel it that way. Don’t blame her nor get upset! Therefore, something must and will change between you two, your mind disposition and feelings towards her, forcefully have to be reshaped and adjusted, because your dreams and hopes just died. You feel awkward when you gaze into her eyes now, as it’s not the same anymore after that final and needed answer she gave you. It will never be!
Gradually, she must end in your life, you have to make it happen. This if want to someday be able to look back to her without resentment and sorrow.
You can compare a beating heart to a ticking clock, and you may have already noticed the more you focus on the ticking, the easier you differentiate it amongst the white noise and the louder it starts to sound. As a clock, your heart feels the passage of time, each day you continue in an unconfortable situation (in this case the experience of unrequited love), the heavier those days reflect on your character and the more you will drag yourself hopelessly through life.
So what you’ll need to do is as basic as removing the clock battery, (you’ll have to grow colder, just for a moment), and then there will be no sound. A silent sense of joy. No rush! You are finally free from the burden of unreturned love. Your heart has to stop beating exclusively for that one girl, simply because she can’t hear it, thus it’s not smart of you to try and keep it ticking.
And this is the beginning of the “letting go” process; you will perceive it gets easier the further you distance yourself from those past dying ticks, until the day comes when you will catch nothing at all. You became deaf or insensitive to it, the ringing in your ears is gone.
So there you are, you finally found a way to outdistance that clock. Now all you’ve got to do is buy a new one!